Swalpa Adjust Maadi!


Some humour on the way to saying 2k5 goodbye by theSilverBullet
December 30, 2005, 7:52 pm
Filed under: humour, Kannada

English Band

Karnataka Version

Complexity

ACDC

CurrentuByattree

High

Aha

Oho

Killer

All Saints

Yella Saadhugale

Low

Audio Slave

Dhvani Gulaama

Low

BabyFace

MaguMaka

Low

Back Street Boys

Hind beedhi huduguru

Low

Bad Boys Blue

Neeli Poli huduguru

Medium

Bad Company

Kettu Kharkane

Medium

Baker Street

Iyengar Raste

High

Bananarama

Devuru Baalehannu

Killer

Barenaked ladies

Nagnavaadhu Hengusuru

Low

Billy Idol

Bekkina Vigraha

High

Black crowes

Kappu Kaagigalu

Low

Black Sabbath

Kari Sabbakki bathu

High

Blind Melon

Kurudu Kalangri

High

Chemical Brothers

Rasayane sodharegalu

High

ColdPlay

ChaliAta

Low

Collective Soul

Atma Chow Chow

High

Color me badd

Kettudage banna haki

High

counting Crows

Enuso kaagigalu

Low

Creed

Vichara

High

Culture Club

Samskaradha Ispet Kendra

Killer

Cutting Crew

Hajam Nan makalu

High

Deep Blue Something

Aallla Neeli eno

High

Def Leppard

Kivdu Chirute

Low

Dire Straits

Sakkath Ayomaya

High

Duran Duran

Maadu Ood-dha Maadu Ood-dha

High

Eagles

Garuda

Low

Everything but the Girl

Figar bittu bere yalla

Medium

Faith Hill

Nambike Betta

Medium

Faster Pussycat

Bega bekku

High

Fine Young Cannibals

Valle yuva nara-bakshakaru

High

FireHouse

Benkimane

Low

Fools Garden

Huchura udhyanavana

Medium

FourPlay

Nalaku Jana Aadodhu

High

Garbage

Kachada

Low

Gipsy Kings

Lambadi Raja

Killer

Go West

Paschima Hogi

Medium

GodSmack

Devuru Kapala

Medium

Goo goo dolls

gugoo (peddu) gombegalu

Killer

Grateful Dead

Aabhari Sattavaru

High

Greenday

Hasuru Dhina

Low

HoobaStank

Yarappa bittidhu?

High

INXS

Solpa Jaasthi Aithu

High

Iron Maiden

Kabna-dha Kanya

Medium

Journey

Prayana

Low

Kansas

Krishnan maavan-dhu

Killer

Linkin Park

Jodso Udyana

High

Little River Band

Chikka Nadhi Baaja

Low

Lou bega

Ousara

Killer

Matchbox 20

Benkipatna ippathu

Medium

Maxi Priest

Langa-ony Poojari

High

Meat Loaf

Mamsada thundu

Medium

MegaDeth

Vishaala-Saavu

Medium

Metallica

Kabna-nekkan-a?

High

Modern Talking

Aadunika Maathu

Medium

Moody Blues

Neeli Feelingu

Medium

Naughty by Nature

Modhlinda Thunturu

High

NickelBack

Childre vapas

Medium

No Doubt

Anumanane illa

Medium

Noble Savages

Punyathma baddi makalu

Killer

Papa Roach

Jirle appa

Medium

Pearl Jam

Mutthina Gojju

High

Pet Shop Boys

Saakuva Praani Angadi Huduguru

High

PM Dawn

Sandhye-ne Bellagge

Killer

Radio Head

Aakasha Vani Thale

Medium

Rainbow

Indradhanusu

Low

Red Hot Chilli Peppers

Bisi Bisi Kempu Menasinkai galu

Medium

Red Nex

Kempu Kathu

Low

Roxette

Yella Thara Kallu

Killer

Rush

Bega

Low

Salt N Pepa

Uppu Kara

Low

Scorpions

Chhelugalu

Low

Seal

Mucchu

Killer

Simply Red

Sumne Kempu

Medium

six pence none the richer

aaru kaasu astay saaku

High

Smashing Pumpkins

Vadadhuhogthairo Kumblekaigalu

Medium

Smashmouth

Moothi vadee

High

Snoop Doggy Dogg

Thika-nai-mari

Killer

Soul Asylum

Atma ke Lodge

High

Spice Girls

Sambhara Hudigiru

High

StarShip

Nakshatradha Dhoni

Medium

Stone Temple Pilots

Kallidha Devasthanada Pushpaka chalakaru

Killer

Take That

Thogo Adhu

Medium

Tears For Fears

Bhayake Kaneeru

High

The Byrds

Pakshigalu

Low

The Police

Hoysala

High

The Who

Yaaru

Low

Third Eye Blind

Moorne Kannu Kurudu

Medium

U2

Ninu kuda?

High

UB40

Mallya Nalavatthu

Killer

Uncle Cracker

Vadiyo mama

Medium

Uriah Heep

Shagni Kuppe

Medium

Weather Report

Vaathavarna Soochane

Medium

wet wet wet

vadday vadday vaddy

Low

Yes

Howdu

Low

Bands banned in Karnataka, Translation Problems.

Jamiroquai

Jethro Tull

Antharax

Queensryche

Lynyrd Skynyrd

Credence Clearwater Revival

Bands that have always been welcome, (Names already sound like kannada)

Beck

Cat

Pre-Trans

Nelly

Tap

Pre-Trans

Madonna

Shall we?

Pre-Trans

via RVINST

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Yavaag Foreign Ge ?? by theSilverBullet
July 26, 2005, 5:56 pm
Filed under: Bangalore, humour, Information Technology, IT

[English Translation – When are u going to some Foreign country?? ]

This has since been attributed to this blogger, Jagadish. And he has his post here

The familiar sentence is arguably one of the most frequently asked questions , losing only slightly to the even more grave one “…yavaag maduve ?”, (when is your marriage?) to someone who unluckily happens to be in the IT Industry and in Bangalore . There was never a better conversation topic for the older generation to suck every drop of blood the poor bloke manages to save despite working as a techie.

It’s a wave that everyone wants to be part of, and everyone wants to show they know. The word computer is now a house-hold name. A good relief for many topic starved aunties and uncles, but our poor techie gets stuck like a nail that’s half into the wood when it’s head decides to painfully break lose.

The popular following that IT has gotten in recent years has been more due to the lucrative travel, than what the techie believes is due to his work. This time it is the uncles who have the upper hand in ! making a conversation, owing to some ‘extra’ knowledge, thanks to ‘external’ contacts. Aunties resign to just asking “…yenappa computer aa ?” ( literally means ” are u a computer ?”, but it is supposed to be “Are you working in the IT field ?”. One must be ready to field a volley of smirks and barrage of questions, if the victim answers a “no”, though it would be the right answer for such a question. For if you are not part of the bandwagon, then you’d rather term yourself a foolish old crackpot and be happy with that, than get a loathesome look from the omnipresent aunty.

IT has such a popular following here, most do not know what they are following, but just drift along to be ‘seen’. Our aunty gets into her form, and asks our techie, “you computer, my son also computer” …our techie, just out of a ctrl-alt-tab-enter, has no idea how to respond to this inhuman potrayal, by the aunty, of her son. He just smiles and says “wonderful aunty, which company ?” and is hardly inte! rested in what he hears. The aunty carries on.. ” nun maga sapoo”…the indianised MNC becomes “sapoo” from SAP, while our techie replies back, “i work for GE”..aunty is a bit concerned on hearing that, and blurts out “is it a good company ? didnt u get in infosys ?”…techie is at his wits end to explain; aunty is in no mood to understand. aunty’s techie son is blushing ear to ear.

while the general social understanding of an IT company hovers between Infosys and Wipro, some good souls give respect to “Vorakal” too. So aunties are generally happy if one is from any of these companies. The other companies will only mean a detailed interrogation about the techie’s academic credentials, past criminal record, if any, and a sure minus point as a prospective groom.

It is the conversation between aunties that is the most funny and amazingly astonishing. Recently one of my cousins went onsite, and i being the scape goat , who still ‘had’ to be in India , was the butt of all discussions.

aunty1 : ” foreign ge yaavaga ivnu hogodu ?” ( when is he going onsite ?)
aunty2 : “gothilla, innenu swalpa divsdalley hogthaaneno” ( He might go in some days !)
aunty1 : “hmmm…they say only brilliants (sic) are sent onsite”
aunty2 : “that’s true !”

I was being murdered inch by inch, neat and clean. My reputation in tatters.

This is even bearable, but get this, if a techie manages to stumble on an onsite travel but is cancelled on that last millisecond, then his future i! s doomed, for aunties will have a field day disecting him and nailing him for not working well at the office. I have been most unfortunate in this case, so much so that if i had got a call to abort the travel 2 seconds later than what i got, i might have had to jump off the plane mid-air.

aunties started flowing in from early evening that day, some trying to stay oblivious of the situation, some trying hard to keep a straight face, and a few more giving their own versions of my story, which by the way i never told anyone !…well one aunty even had the nerve to ask me “did you have a fight with your manager ?”..well i was kind enough to say “no aunty, project got scrapped “, only to realize that the aunty had no idea what a project meant, and instead pressed me to agree that i had indeed done some mistake…finally she let me go when i blurted out “my manager had a fight with the airlines”….well that was enough for me to roll over on the floor and laugh at her, despite the ‘humiliation’ of not going onsite.

uncles are not far off, and are ever more eager to learn ‘computers’. One uncle was particularly curious to know as to why we guys were paid for playing computer games !…apparantely he was of this view after he had seen his 9 year old son only playing games on his newly bought comp. I knew better than to explain, so i told him that it was because if we won, the company would get money. uncle’s spirits rose, and in all probability he would have gone home and pestered his innoncent 9 year old son to teach him to play games in the hopes of joining a IT company in future !

uncles are a little more “knowledgeable” though. One uncle came to me one day, when i made the suicidal mistake of attending a social gathering full of aunties and uncles, and asked me as to which company i worked for, and i answered him hoping he would stop there. however , uncle had no such intention and carried on ” yaav language ?”…though stunned, i rep! lied back “c sharp uncle” …uncle’s face glowed and then he said ” nun maga Java , c# bidhoithanthey!” (My son works on JAVA, C sharp has long fallen from grace) .. In most uncles view, languages are like company shares, the value of which keeps fluctuating on an hourly basis.

Though salary is something of a sensitive issue, uncles don’t give didly-squat about that and continue questioning the techie on the same. I was ripped apart when i told my uncle that my gross was 25k, to which my uncle in suspended euphoria exclaimed that his son earned 2.5 lakh per month at onsite. Having no room to argue, i kept mum, when my uncle went off again “why dont u ask your manager for a raise”…. I told him i would consider his advise and ask, though my manager was bit of a dragon, unlike my uncle’s son’s manger, who was a saint just short of a halo!

Even more weird is the funny way in which people take those mails managers send to tec! hies and their team, as to the good work being done. one of my cousins who recently joined my company got such a mail from his manager, and he thought it was a good idea to take a print out and show it to his father, a folly he still regrets to this day. My uncle not only read the copy, but made a hundred photocopies and distributed it as pamplets to his near and dear ones. My dad got one too, and i had to field some intense questioning at home, since i had not managed to get one such letter even once ! i had even gone to the extent of thinking about printing one on my own just to escape the ‘humiliation’.

while it’s often funny to listen to the weird misconceptions people have about IT, it gets irritating if it goes too far. It would be a boring place without the aunties and the uncles, but it would be a wonderful place, if they knew better than to draw conclusions about one’s work, of which they know so less about !

[received as mail forward: let us know if you know the origin of the article]